Over the last few months and years we have been surrounded by buzzwords such as: mindful living, living in the moment, staying present etc. 

Mindfulness is for sure not a new word or a new concept it actually originates from the early teachings of the Buddha.

We live in an incredibly fast paced society. More than the human body can  handle. The body finds itself in a constant state of sympathetic activation (fight or flight response), and rarely coming back into the “rest and digest” state (parasympathetic). 

The aim of this text is not to dive into the origins of mindfulness and  mindful living, nor to share the consequences of a fast paced way of living  (such as stress, anxiety, burnout, depression, sleeping problems, etc.) 

My aim is rather to share some ideas and best practices of slowing down,  and provide you with some useful tools and tips on this topic.

What does slowing down actually mean?

Through my teachings, encounters with friends and clients, I’m constantly  being confronted with people’s desire to slow down. Moving from one day to the next, without too much long term planning.

The most common complaints I hear are, “I have too much on my mind”,  “my work is very demanding”,  “I can’t slow down because  people expect me to deliver”,  “I don’t know how to relax”, etc.

You may wonder what is the purpose of slowing down? A frequent argument I hear is, "if I’m not as active and available all the time, I will miss out on all  the fun stuff". How about practicing being rather than doing? 

Absorbing, pausing, stopping vs. rushing. We have been taught that the more  we do and achieve, the better. We will be appreciated more, and thus more  successful. This need to constantly do, sounds more like, not being able to  sit with what is, the need to run away from the discomfort of NOT knowing (and NOT planning).

In one of my favourite, guided meditations by David Gandelman, he says:

"the art of mediation is the art of not doing. It’s the opposite of everything else you do.”

What about reflection?

Reflection is an essential component of life. Both reflection and creativity stall when we keep ourselves too busy. It has been proven that creativity and imagination cannot flourish when we are under stress and constant pressure. 

I’m sure you have all heard the expression “just sleep on it” and you’ll decide tomorrow. Try to see ‘reflection’ as a way to sleep on an idea, a plan, a project, and tackle it again the next day. Going through life without pausing to reflect is like running around in circles like a headless chicken, trying to reach your next goal or destination. It doesn’t really work, does it?!

I guess you are starting to understand what I’m trying to get to. Slowing down is a personal choice. No-one will tell you that you are too busy or you need more time for yourself, how could anyone know? Plus being busy these days is considered cool & hard working. 

Take a moment to reflect, and look at your last few weeks, months or even years. What have you been up to? Is there a fair balance between work and play? Are you spending your evenings in your most ideal way? What does your self-care routine look like?

When was the last time you had a free evening to yourself, or zero plans and you decided to take the weekend as it comes?

So how do I actually slow down?

Slowing down won’t happen from one moment to the next. Many people expect to be in full speed the entire week, and once Friday evening or Saturday morning come; they wonder why things are not calmer. This is basically like driving 200 km/h on the highway and then expecting the car to come to a complete stop all of a sudden. It doesn’t really work that way. 

Remember I mentioned the notion of being rather than doing/achieving, try to observe your mind during the day, how many times do you catch yourself saying “I need to do this”, “I better finish washing the laundry”, “I must go to the gym otherwise”, “I really need to go to that party/event/networking evening, everyone will be there, I will miss out, and won’t catch Bob to ask him about that super important thing”…sounds familiar?

Being versus doing, are you still with me? Stop holding your breath, and breatheeee a little! 

Slowing down goes hand in hand with mindfulness. Sit in your chair (or wherever you are at this very moment), place your hands on your belly, feel the belly expand as you inhale and contract as you exhale, feel your feet make contact with the ground, observe any sensations in your body (discomfort, pain, the material of your clothes). 

Observe, where your mind is taking you? What is it saying? Can you let it be, without attaching yourself to your thoughts, without judging yourself?

Next time you are walking outside (without your phone in your hands), look up, what do you see? What do you notice that you haven’t seen before? Make eye contact with a stranger or offer them a soft smile. 

How many times throughout the day do you find yourself on autopilot? What do I mean by that?: do you remember locking your front/car door today? Do you recall brushing your teeth, or is it just a blur? Do you recall pouring yourself tea/coffee/water or were you thinking about your first meeting of the day? During your gym class were you wondering what you will have for dinner, or when this class will come to an end?

Slowing down is not an easy job, but the sooner you catch yourself in the doing mode, in the autopilot mode or on “go, go, go”, stop, pause, and take 5-10 deep breaths. Observe and become aware of your senses: the smell, the sounds around you, the touch, what do you see, or taste.

More tools for slowing down

Other tools which will help you slow down and can be used daily are for example meditation and yoga. To keep you motivated, try to meditate with a group or using an app, such as Insight Timer. 

As you might already know, yoga is an excellent way of slowing down, connecting with your breath, and most importantly activating the parasympathetic nervous system.

Do one thing per day that makes you happy and excited. Enjoy it from start to finish. 

Indulge in a favourite activity that nourishes and recharges you. Whether it’s sports, reading, yoga, taking a bath, arts & crafts. Set yourself, mind and body completely free!

Do you still need some help slowing down? Here is a free 25 minute yoga practice to help you unwind and find peace of mind again!